That’s (not) hot

I only recognize how miserably hot it is because our hvac system sucks donkey danglies. Furnace dudes claim our air conditioning unit is actually large for our size house, but you’d never know it sitting in here. Tom’s office (on the SW corner of the house) is easily 25 degrees warmer than the rest of the house year-round. When we finished our basement two years ago, the inspector told me she was excited to see how our contractor did the ceiling because we had “the worst laid-out ductwork” she’d ever seen.

So if you’re looking for an anniversary gift for me (this Sunday…12 years!), bring me the brain-dead idiot who designed this nightmare of a duct system with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is. Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where’s the Tylenol?*

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

*With love from my favorite holiday movie, National Lampoon’s Christmas Vacation.

Advertisements

9 Responses

  1. SELL!
    SELL!

    (there’s a nice place up for sale in my neighbourhood …)

  2. Want to move to WI? We have some great houses in our neighborhood, too…

  3. Oh, nooooooo….. you got a long way to go ’til summer’s over. Stock up on ice.

  4. Donkey danglies! That’s the best laugh I’ve had all day!

    We had the same problem and had to get a bigger unit.

    (Unit and donkey danglies in the same comment. My day is looking up!)

  5. Thanks, I needed that!!!

  6. LOL. You are funny when hot.

  7. Oh, you should SO totally move to Orlando!!!!

  8. I’m really glad it was not me who designed and installed your duct work. But if it is any consolation, it’s been hot here in Maine also. And most of us do not have AC at all. I feel your pain.

  9. Macrum might be warm where he is, but where I am on the coast, we’ve got a fair breeze that requires two blankets at night.

    Find a good (union) sheet metal shop, have the guy come over and look at the ductwork, draw up a plan and an estimate, and just have it done. What you spend re-doing the ductwork will be saved in fuel and electricity costs inside two years.

    If anybody tries to put flex duct in, throw them out bodily. Same goes for duct made from styrofoam insulation. Get the real deal and insulate that. Good luck!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: